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13th July 2016
07:20pm BST

2. You're probably not a late developer
Those stories you were told about lads on the county team who never played minors or under-21s, they were still class players, starring for their schools, and maybe just needed to hit the weights to fine-tune their games.
3. The manager isn't harder on his son than he is anybody else
No matter how many times he says it, let's face it: the son's shit... and he's still playing every week.
4. Big Johnny isn't thrown into full forward because he's a good high ball option
He's in there to keep him out of the way.
5. You're a bloody brilliant 'keeper
In other words, we really f**king need a 'keeper.
6. We have a good game plan
Give it to Timmy and get the hell out of his way.
7. He doesn't know how it works either
"If you're going to keep making a balls of it, let's just move on." That drill was way over his head.
8. There's no-one in that ear piece
But it looks cool.
9. Core exercises
Coaches are just being told to do them, they don't know why. So they're giving you circuit training to take the evening off.
10. "I don't need to be here"
He does. He's got nothing else on.
And last but not least...
11. If you don't train, you WILL play
As long as you're good enough, like.
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