The self-proclaimed "fastest growing sport in the world" is getting pretty damn popular.
An increased interest means a greater level of participation, or at least, more delusional chancers thinking they have what it takes to make it to the dizzying heights of the UFC.
Well, it's not all custom-fitted suits and performance bonuses in MMA. If you feel like you have the mettle to become a professional fighter, take this test to see just how ready you really are.
Test 1: Discipline
1. Live like a monk.
Cut out all things from your life that might loosely be called 'enjoyment'. Once they're gone start into the list headed 'mildly entertaining'.
2. Train like a triathlete.
Run, swim, cycle, lift weights. Repeat. When you think you'd like to sit down, get in the Octagon.
3. Eat like a caveman.
If it tastes nice, or even if it has taste at all, it's not for you.
Test 2: Fitness
1. Do the hardest workout you've ever done in your life to the point where you're on the verge of vomiting. Then do it again.
2. Repeat process six days a week, before your day job and the several hours of technique training in the evening.
Test 3: Physical toughness
1. Take a hard shot to the groin.
Show no pain.
2. Get poked in the eye.
Again, no pain.
3. Have your arm nearly ripped from its socket.
It's just an arm.
4. Bruise a rib.
Come on.
5. Almost get choked unconscious.
Trying to sneak in a nap? Lazy.
6. Break your nose.
It's just a nose bleed.
7. Shatter your orbital bone.
In fairness that sounds painful.
8. Rupture the tendons in your hands.
You've still got your legs
9. Have your leg kicked repeatedly to the point where there is a serious risk of thrombosis.
Oh.
10. After all that, fight for ten more minutes.
Test 4: Mental strength
Pick a fight with someone who either looks like or actually has just been released from prison in front of a crowd who are literally screaming for your untimely death.
Try not to soil yourself.
Test 5: Maturity
Insert the word "Gi" into conversations without giggling like a schoolgirl.
Test 6: Money
1. Get used to not having a lot of it.
Trainers, gym membership, equipment, hospital bills, promoters, travel expenses, they all add up.
2. Keep your day job, while training twice a day.
You'll need it to fund the fighting.
Test 7: Motivation
What are you really after here? Becoming an MMA fighter for all the wrong reasons will only result in disappointment. You don't want to get into the fight business in pursuit of the following:
1. Money
See Test 6.
2. Fame
Jon Jones, arguably the greatest MMA fighter ever, is the least famous of his siblings.
3. To be more attractive to the opposite sex
They say that "chicks dig scars", but that really doesn't include cauliflower ears, obliterated noses and split lips resembling Chris Nolan's version of the Joker.
https://twitter.com/ShylaMacaluso/status/620760707341004800
Test 8: Humility
Ask yourself would you be willing to take any fight that's offered? Even if that means slugging it out with a bouncer in a Tesco carpark for a purse of a
Finest meal deal.
It may not be the glamorous MGM Grand bout you had dreamed of, but it's a stepping stone towards it.
Test 10: Cutting
1. You know all that stuff that you put in your body that keeps you alive?
Yeah, stop consuming that for about a week.
2. When you reach the point of starvation...
... hit the treadmill, the sauna and the epsom salt baths because you've still got six pounds to lose before hitting the scales.
Test 11: Criticism
Get used to hearing the following phrases:
1. Sure you won by knockout, but can you do it against a BJJ-practitioner?
2. Sure you won by submission, but can you do it against a wrestler?
3. Sure you're now the champion, but why are ducking this guy? Don't be scared, homie.
4. You lost therefore you are shit.
Test 12: Restraint
Highly-trained combat artists need to be responsible. You don't want to end up as the next Cameron Poe catching Con Air's next flight.
1. Maintain composure
You don't want to go full
Leslie Smith and Heather Clark when some drunken eejit oversteps the mark. Lawsuits can be costly.
2. Numb yourself to the ignorance
Most people know it's not cage-fighting or choreographed WWE style bouts. Some interviewers will have an agenda or the researcher won't put in the work.
Test 13: Judgment
Certain people will always be prejudiced against those who choose to fight to earn their crust. There will always be a stigma attached to the fighting profession.
In preparation for all this prejudice, here are some other sure-fire ways to get other people to judge you.
1. Grow a man-bun.
2. Get a neck tattoo.
3. Wear sunglasses all year round.
3. Suit up, regardless of the occasion... oh my God, we've just described Conor McGregor. That was 100% accidental.
Test 14: Monotony
1. Have a stranger ask you how your camp is going.
2. Repeat step one.
3. Repeat step one.
4. Repeat step one.
5. Keep repeating step one until you've lost the will to live. Alternatively, spend a few days in Abu Ghraib for a watered-down version of the psychological torture a fighter experiences from the media during fight week.
You are now ready to be an MMA fighter, go out there and get that coveted golden strap. You've earned it, kiddo. 
