"You just can't let your guard down for a split second... "
16 months on and Johnny Sexton has been reflecting on what, to date, has been the toughest week of his time as Ireland captain.
Now in his 14th year of international rugby, the Leinster outhalf was twice in the captaincy conversation for Ireland - losing out to Jamie Heaslip then Rory Best - before he landed the role. Like so many, many others his 2020 started with grand plans and was tossed to kingdom come.
Ireland started with Six Nations victories over Scotland and Wales then ran into England at Twickenham and got shredded. They lost 24-12, were thoroughly bested in all aspects and needed a late Andrew Porter try to make the final score a tad more respectable. Then, Covid-19 really took hold and rugby went on a six-month hiatus.
When it returned, Ireland were able to put themselves in with a shot of winning the title on the final weekend. England's 34-5 win over Italy, on that final day, meant Ireland could win the title by beating France by either seven points or scoring four tries (or more) in a Parisian victory.
Ireland gave it everything in the first half but went in trailing 17-13 after turning down penalties to go for attacking lineouts and mauls that were shut down. For Sexton, that was one regret. More was to follow.
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Ireland captain Johnny Sexton speaks to his team-mates after France scored their third try, at Stade de France in Paris. (Photo by Sportsfile)[/caption]
Johnny Sexton on the reaction to his reaction
France pulled away in the second half as Romain Ntamack scored a try and kicked two penalties. A Robbie Henshaw try with 20 minutes to go gave Ireland some hope but they could not get it going again.
Seeking to freshen up wearying troops and give France new problems to solve, Andy Farrell brought off Bundee Aki, Conor Murray and, with 12 minutes to play, his captain.
Sexton was frustrated that he would not be left out on the pitch to fashion a comeback that was not yet impossible. He had, after all, pulled off a miracle at the same ground in 2018.
Farrell brought on Ross Byrne and Sexton
could not hide his feelings. Given his history with France - having had many epic battles with Les Bleus and played with Racing 92 for two seasons - the cameras focused on an irate captain as he stalked off the pitch.
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'It makes you stronger,' says Sexton
Both sides scored a try apiece in the closing stages but the final result -
a 35-27 France win - meant neither would win the Six Nations. Asked in that post-match press conference about his sullen reaction to being subbed, Sexton said:
"Yeah, I was very disappointed coming off, like everyone would be. You're losing the game and you're coming off... so, what would you like me to be doing when I'm coming off the pitch?"
He would later [a few days later] reflect that, as captain, he was setting a bad example by his actions after being replaced. Used to the media glare, and public commentary, for most of his career, that only increased when the outhalf was made captain. He was 35, but there were still lessons to learn.
Heading into the 2022 Six Nations, and fully settled into his role, Sexton was more reflective when he spoke with the press, on Tuesday.
"I learned a lot of lessons that week," he said, "before, after, during."
Asked if it his dealings with the media at the time was the biggest eye-opener, he replied, "That one immediately stands out in terms of learnings.
"We didn't get our prep right and that's a huge responsibility that is down to the captain. We didn't get our performance right on the day which probably stems from some of the prep and then obviously the stuff that was written about and the reaction.
"When you come off, like I explained at the time as much of it was about disappointment in myself that I didn't play as I wanted to or the team didn't play as I wanted us to.
"You just can't let your guard down for a split second or a small mistake like that can be magnified into something huge.
"But again, it makes you stronger and more prepared to try and bounce back and prove people wrong."
Back in October and November 2020, there were certainly questions over whether Sexton, and Farrell, were the right men for the job. Not from all corners, but definitely a couple.
Their 2021 Six Nations hopes were dashed with that early red card for Peter O'Mahony, in Cardiff, and a stray Billy Burns kick for touch. The limp surrender against France, the following weekend, had both captain and coach on the hot plate again.
What has followed since, over the past 11 months, is an Ireland side growing into itself and well led by a captain and coach that read each other well.
Johnny Sexton knows, though, that this Six Nations championship is all about following through on promise and ending with a title.
