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26th October 2017
04:23pm BST
Looks, the year is ending and if you’ve been training over the past ten months you’ll see faces a plenty come and go but they all come crawling back for the last game of the season.
The working commitments they cited since March seemed to have disappeared and the lad you grew up with right until minor but disappeared after that have even come out to get a game.
The gang is all back together, what a time to be alive.
Before the warm up the captain says "this is the last one of the year."
As per, you’re all sitting in the dressing room having a bit of a laugh. Because of all the old faces, you haven’t seen for years you have no intentions of moving from your seat but warm up time hits.
“Right lads, last warm-up of the season,” the captain will say “Let's make it a good one.”
*Sigh*
The manager's speech
Back into the dressing rooms it is, the team is to be named and it’s the manager’s turn to talk.
“Right lads, its great to see so many faces up here today,” an Bainisteoir says.
“Maybe we didn’t have the year we quite wanted but, sure, we’ll try end it on a high and give it our best.”
And then proceeds to name a team full of lads that haven’t made one training all year.
The Captain’s speech
If the manager was measured the captain is anything but.
“Right lads, this is it now until next February, can we go out there and f*cking play like it…please?!
“I know there are a few old faces up here we haven’t seen all year, that’s great now I challenge ye all to come up next year and nail a starting place with this team.
“Let’s go out there and bate the living sh*te out of these f*ckers, COME ONNNNNNN”
One lad pissed off he’s dropped because of the blow-ins
He never misses a training, he never misses a match and has worked damn hard throughout the year but it doesn’t matter, the manager’s old favourites are back.
The poor bucko will be sitting on the sideline cursing the more talented but umpteen times lazier teammate that got selected ahead of him.
The halftime speech
(Image credit: AIB)
If you hear “This is the last game of the year” one more time you swear,
It has lost its effect now, just give over.
The manager’s full-time speech
After all the roaring about this being the last match of the year the manager's full-time speech is a bit more subdued.
If you win the match it goes something like:
“Great end to the season lads, look things didn’t all go our way throughout the year but fair play to you all, you’re all a great group of lads and a credit to your families, your club, and your parish.”
If you lose it’ll be the exact same speech except it starts with “Well lads, not the way we wanted to go out and…”
The captain’s thank you to the managers and the awkward round of applause
Now, this is the one part of the season that brings real feels to the squad, after the manager finishes up and you’re all about to move the captain stands up.
“I think I speak on behalf of all the lads in this dressing room when I say a big thank you to all the coaching staff, we all recognise that you’re doing all of this for nothing and we don’t take it for granted.
“So, I think all the lads will join in with me in a round of applause for everyone that put in all the hours in over the year."
